Friday, September 12, 2008

Day 34: The Metrodome, Minneapolis; September 11

I would have to say that I am probably the only person in the history of the planet to drive nearly 1000 miles in a single day- risking life and limb in torrential rains- with the goal being to get CLOSE to Minneapolis as not to miss the next day's Twins/Royals game. That was yesterday. Today the goal is to make the last 150 miles to the ugliest stadium in MLB and to get some sleep in a real bed. I arrive about noon and start haggling with a father - almost 80 years old- and son scalping team over a mediocre ticket. I spend $10 and walk around the VERY out of date stadium. The place is pretty empty so I ask a woman in the outfield (who has the entire 2000 seat section to herself) to take a photo of me. We chat for a few innings and then I grab a jumbo dog 'chicago' style and am not let down at all! I spend the last three innings in the eighth row and eventually watch the Twins lose in 10 innings. Leaving the stadium is fun as it seems they only have one exit and people have to use it one at a time as it's a freaking REVOLVING DOOR!!!! I decide that a trip to the Mall of America is in order as I need some new luggage for the flurry of flights I have ahead in the next week as well as to get a replacement for the belt that broke in Cedar Point. I leave the stadium at 3:30 and get to the mall- approximately 20 miles away- AT SIX O'CLOCK!!! Minneapolis apparently makes highways for the sake of making them. I never thought I would use the words 'gratuitous' and 'highways' next to one another in one sentence, but that's how I feel as I endlessly drive from one wrong freeway to another. I mistakenly forgot to get the mall's address for my GPS, so I call my friend, Jeff, to ask for help, "I"m on highway 77 South," I say. "I've never heard of 77," he replies. I hate this city. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!!!!!!! When it's time to LEAVE the mall I can't find my car of course because the parking garages for the LARGEST MALL IN THE WORLD are HORRENDOUS and NEVER-ENDING! I finally meet Jeff and his family at Champs restaurant for dinner close to 8:30. "Is that the first time you've ever been to the Mall of America?" he asks me upon arrival to dinner. "No," I say. "But it is most certainly the last!"

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